Log in

a storybook ending [entries|friends|calendar]

[ website | crazy world of juliane? ]
[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[08 Aug 2010|12:38am]
[ mood | anxious ]

Falling Stars

[29 May 2010|01:54am]
[ mood | exanimate ]

it feels like i'm drowning and everyone i know is standing around watching, remarking on how it'll be okay because i'm such a strong swimmer.

Falling Stars

[11 May 2010|01:49am]
[ mood | cheerful ]

hmm. i haven't updated in a while. i guess a lot has happened. i decided i wanted to go into student affairs instead of art. i got into both grad schools i applied to, buff state and canisius. and now i just have to pick between the two. at least they're both in buffalo. i also applied to a ton of RD jobs all over, so we'll see. it's looking like buff state.

if/when i do move to buffalo i'll at least be reunited with my wing man. i've been quite oblivious with certain things over the past few years, and i realized that it's because kait's not around to point out the obvious that, it's not that i don't want to see it but i don't expect to see it. we still do it for each other long distance, but it's in the past tense. "hey, do you think this means... yeah, that's what i thought. totally didn't get THAT at the time"

i had a really random but fun weekend in potsdam. i got to see a lot of wonderful people, got to repeat the long story of "what are you doing?" over and over. and it snowed. i should have known better but i wasn't expecting it because it's been in the 90s in new paltz

Falling Stars

[19 Nov 2009|04:25am]
[ mood | calm ]

my head really hurts.
krystal think i got a concussion.
the lump is getting smaller but a faint bruise is starting to appear.

eh, whatever.

i worked on my resume tonight. i feel as if i'm forgetting major things. it felt as if i was tremendously busy the past few years, but everything on paper it looks...so... simple. did i do anything at college?
i've just listed things i've done, i haven't even begun to explain what they are. oh boy. it's 3 pages as is, at least.

Falling Stars

[17 Nov 2009|03:13am]
[ mood | artistic ]

oops, i did it again.

i drew another zombie fetus. (follow the link and then click the image to make it bigger)

Zombie Fetus 2
by ~shinytoasterofdoom on deviantART

this one is better than the last one, i think. i melted crayon and wax onto an old pizza box. the wax was scented, so the drawing smells pretty :/
i like drawing more than sculpting as of late. whether it be good or not is besides the point.

apparently there's a meteor shower going on. i stood on my ottoman under my sky light for a while, i thought i finally saw a meteor but it turned out to be a plane. whatever.

i went to nyc last saturday. i got drunk and was kicked out of a vegan restaurant. at some point i hit my head (there's a lump on my forehead, though it cant be seen thankfully) and i dont know how/when etc. it hurts tremendously, though. and then if i/something touches it... instant headache. so i'm obviously avoiding that.

Falling Stars

[06 Oct 2009|01:58am]
[ mood | recumbent ]

i've had a sore throat for the past few weeks, which was nothing new. the doctors here are amazing, they practice modern medicine. they gave me antibiotics, i'll find out in a few days that i don't have strep for sure. my throat still kind of hurts though my tonsils are significantly smaller. so we'll see i guess.

i keep saying that people don't make sense, but matt pointed out that they do if you know the full story. which he's right about. i'm really eager to learn the full story on some so i can understand why they're so messed up. though i think i already know.

on the bright side, i've been making chocolate chip cookies (from scratch!) and they're amaaazing. and my ceramics class is getting better, we're working with material i've never worked with before. so that's at least a new challenge. i made elvis's head out of paper clay :D
paper clay is the epitome of evil, though i long to master it. i have to carve porcelain for my next project.... YIKES

Falling Stars

[09 Sep 2009|04:18am]
[ mood | amused ]

potsdam was fun, i saw a lot of people i miss. i slept in the same room as kait which always proves to be interesting. i think she watches me sleep, because she's mildly creepy like that. every time we sleep in the same room she always has a story about something i did. whether it's "you started breathing heavily/angrily and it got stronger and stronger until you shouted (angrily) "HANAKA!!!!" and then you stopped and were quiet and peaceful again" or "you said "limited time chicken" in angst. etc. this time, two nights in a row, apparently i sighed a lot. as if i was judging people. so apparently i sleep judge. that sounds about right. i remember the first time i was having an awkward dream. i woke up because she left her phone near my face so when it rang... well, good morning brandon paterson.

tonight was brilliantly funny and awkward. krystal and i went to a beer store that has 300+ types of beer (heaven) and when we were paying the guy was mildly cute and mildly flirty. i forget how it came up exactly but krystal commented that we'd be drinking beer together even when we're old ladies and i said "yeah, i'm one relationship away from owning 300 cats" and i didn't realize i said it out loud until i saw their reactions. quite funny.

in other news, i got my gps in the mail today. it's name is tim and he has a british accent. i figure if it yells at me for making a wrong turn it may as well sound polite when doing so.

Falling Stars

[28 Aug 2009|02:24pm]
[ mood | angry ]

i don't like talking on the phone. i think that's a well known fact. sometimes when my cell phone rings i'll let it go to voicemail because i genuinely don't feel like talking on it. i feel trapped. like you're supposed to focus all of your attention on this one person. i like my cell phone better than say, a landline, because i'm not restricted to one space.
but honestly, i prefer IM. then i can do 10,000 things at once. don't get me wrong, i do like my cell phone. you can only fight your genetic code so much- sometimes i do like to talk on the phone. and it is horrifically convenient. i'm also addicted to texting. oh how i love texting.
i have 450 minutes per month, verizon to verizon is free. incidentally the majority of my friends are on verizon. so i've never gone over in minutes. i've never even come close to going over in minutes. in fact, i doubt i've ever used more than 50 minutes.

when my dad was in the hospital for 3 weeks it felt like i was on the phone (w/ various people) non stop for 3 weeks. the first week i legit was, i wanted to gouge out my eyeballs. turns out i really was on the phone that long, seeing as i went over in minutes and owe verizon an extra $112. at that point in time i didn't have a landline, and every call was essential. so i can't blame myself too much.

fuck my life...i would switch to someone else except really, all of my friends are on verizon so it'd back fire in the end.

1 Fallen Star| Falling Stars

[27 Aug 2009|03:23pm]
[ mood | calm ]

yesterday i got gassed out of suny new paltz's library. it was horrible. i tried to fight it, i tried really hard. but it was inevitable. apparently the girls here do not use deodorant. that's fine if you don't have B.O. i wanted to die. and there i was, innocently trying to research for ceramics project/print stuff.
ugh. i eventually gave up, printed what i found, and left.

for my ceramics class we're using terra-cotta and i have to make something influenced from it's prior uses in history. so i'm going to make a chia lawn gnome. initially i was going to do a chia lunch lady but the killer gnome would mock the chinese warrior sculptures. we're using Terra Sigillata so i kind of want to continue with my chia body parts- color doesnt matter for them. a terra sigillata lawn gnome doesnt seem as fun as a colored one to me. so we'll see.
perhaps a chai nose?

we learned how to make clay today. it was mildly painful because i've been making my own clay for 5 years. i volunteered to do the first leg of it because then i could see where they keep all of their materials AND mixing the dry stuff is much much much easier than cleaning the mixer. apparently we wont be making our own clay though, work study does it.

oh, i really hate people who are hot and cold. massive pet peeve.

Falling Stars

[25 Aug 2009|10:06pm]
[ mood | annoyed ]

the move went well except i'm pretty sure i accidentally threw my passport out in the process.... i'm not entirely sure but i've searched through just about everything and it's not there. bitter sweet. i'm going to call my landlord tomorrow just to double check. it's $100+ to replace.
new paltz is going well at least. i like my apartment, my grandma gave me a car and i'm taking a ceramics class at suny new paltz. it's all hand building which is what i do, and we're going to be doing some stuff i wasn't allowed to do at potsdam so that's cool. it's a lot of exploration type stuff. the first class was monday.. it's weird because they mix their skill level there. so we'll see. i'm not entirely sure but i dont think i'll be making my own clay... and i don't know about kilns...

5 Fallen Stars| Falling Stars

[16 Aug 2009|12:18pm]
[ mood | annoyed ]

in june i was having mixed feelings about moving and i was presented with an opportunity to stay in potsdam- financially speaking everything would be taken care of, except i'd have to get another job for actual money. i decided not to pursue it because it'd be for all of the wrong reasons. i had to keep telling myself i was being practical and not cynical.

as it turns out i was right. i'm really happy i went with my gut on that one.

new paltz tuesday.

Falling Stars

[15 Aug 2009|05:46am]
[ mood | cynical ]

i woke up a few minutes ago dying of thirst, so i chugged a glass of milk.. and then another glass..and i really want another (it tastes like the nectar of the gods) but i know that 3 glasses may be too intense... that whole it being a base and your stomach being acidic thing.

and i thought to myself "why the craving for milk? wait a minute. i'm drunk. wait... i was really drunk before, oh god... how did this happen? i only had 4 beers" and after a few minutes i remembered they they were german imports and 8 or 9%

so i feel a bit better about it now. i really want bananas but i don't have any. this feels like the school year all over again

1 Fallen Star| Falling Stars

[14 Aug 2009|06:14am]
[ mood | tired ]

past few weeks have been dumb.
last week of july/first part of august was chaotic, i didn't sleep because there was simply no time and way too much stress/things to do. which i guess is okay now, since it's not any worse. really. but it's funny- those who you expect to be the most supportive aren't and the ones you least expect it are. backwards really.
last week i worked 80 hours within 5 days. i found out from one of the girls in the res life office that my stolen (and canceled) debit card was at la casbah.. she works there too, didn't know the situation though. so thursday i called the popo to tell them, was told the cop would call back, didn't. i called him monday.
this past week i did two 16/17 hour days and then fortunately got to double dip on my "work time"...so i didn't die again, which is good. i found out little italy had surveillance footage from the night my stolen card was used there. so hopefully either i or the cops will recognize him/can figure out who it was. they also had the debit card slip, he forged my name. so at least it'll be taken seriously now... and i will be pressing charges, even if he gets a slap on the wrist i'd love for him to get screwed over if he ever does it again. my landlord also outed herself as an idiot. she took the light bulbs away from our porch/driveway lights.... because... it was raising her electric bill. i'd like to point out that my driveway is 1) covered with holes/craters 2) bordered by trees and bushes -- all the better to hide and jump you my dear and 3) pitch black. what about an eco friendly bulb? or a motion light like the one that's around the corner/on the back of the house where the cars are? the light doesnt hit the driveway at all. surely the electric bill must be cheaper than a lawsuit of someone who got hurt because of the lack of light/condition of the driveway.
i'm moving early next week tho... either tuesday or wednesday. so we'll see.

on a side note a girl from my ceramics class died in a car accident on wednesday. she was only 19. RIP courtney

Falling Stars

[30 Jul 2009|04:28am]
[ mood | exhausted ]

i didn't get to nap after all. couldn't fall asleep, ironically. 3 hours (if that) of sleep within 50 hours is probably not the best situation. i'm drinking coffee in effort to make the world less wonky/not hallucinate. hopefully i will sleep 8:30 am - 10:30 am and then i'll be able to drive home.
i'm not looking forward to tomorrow, though i'd imagine tomorrow night i'm going to crash hardcore. it may be epic.

Falling Stars

[29 Jul 2009|08:11pm]
[ mood | groggy ]

i slept for a hour this morning, went home, got stuff done. oddly... things went smoothly. it's official, i hate large corporations and i like the little guy. i've had NO issues with small businesses so far but i've found that the corporations would rather see me paralyzed, except for verizon. i bullied them into submission. i've also discovered that my neighbors at home, who i dont know, are actually rather nice.

i'm really surprised i've pulled off what i have. i think i get to sleep sometime tomorrow night. there's time for a nap tonight which excites me.

Falling Stars

[28 Jul 2009|12:16pm]
[ mood | exhausted ]

i'm not sure what time i woke up on monday but i've been up ever since. i have too much stuff to do today/traveling about to do it. then i have to work 11 pm - 7 am again. so i'll go to sleep in 25 hours?
my entire existence hurts.

edit next week is going to be an 80 hour work week, fml.

Falling Stars

[28 Jul 2009|03:43am]
[ mood | surprised ]

once again weird coincidence has struck my life.

generally i have the attitude of "stay calm, don't over react, don't say something you don't mean" because, well, weird coincidences happen enough that merit this. too much, really.
i think it's safe to say i was mad about the maxfields stuff. pretty mad.

so i was sitting at UP, bored, i probably made my 80th post about the maxfields thing, when suddenly my phone rang. any time my phone rings past midnight i assume something bad has happened. that whole people-only-call-your-house-late-at-night-because-someone-is-dead thing. and it was krystal... why would krystal be up past midnight? oh, she's at maxfields. and sure enough she called to tell me she saw UP there because there was an electrical fire.

hearing that i froze, i was pretty sure i had said "I HOPE THEY BURN!!!!" at some point this past weekend. but whatever. she said she was going to come visit me at work, i figured i'd tell her then. i mean, it was just a small electrical fire. not a big deal.

so she came, i told her what i may have said (i did remember wishing doom, just couldnt remember what exactly)....we laughed, the timing..
that's when she told me it was caused by a gas leak. she also said that she and dave got there at last call. so it happened within minutes of the bar closing. the bartender (this one being the one that handed me a bowl of credit cards to look through, not the one that gave mine away) had heard something odd for about 5 minutes (gas leak! electrical stuff!) until it burst into flames. he was able to put it out with a few glasses of water, so that was cool. it was under the sink. buttt.. they had to kick everyone out because it was a gas leak.
if that had happened half a hour later (or less even) no one would have been there? so thankfully it happened when it did.

i told rinn about it and sure enough she confirmed i said i hoped it burned. this was before i told her what happened. i believe my words were "i hope it burns in hell" "jules, you don't believe in hell" "i hope it burns there anyway" "i hope it burns to the ground" etc.

1 Fallen Star| Falling Stars

[27 Jul 2009|11:37pm]
[ mood | cynical ]

i filed a police report today. the other day the manager of maxfields called to apologize/update/get an update on the debit card situation. i told her it had been used other places/i reported the card/lost stolen so it's off now. and i told her where it was used and for how much. she said something about the bartender thought i was with the guy and said SOMETHING like he thought it was my husband until i said it wasn't my husband. i was dead sober, the word husband was never thrown out there. nor was "i thought you were with him" so she was surprised when i said that along with "they said he was a regular"

pissed. i'm toying with the idea of filing something with the better business bureau. i dont want to over kill it though. i'm moving in a month. it just annoys me that no one bothered to look at the card. and the guy didn't even have a tab to close.

the rest of the weekend shaped up. i hung out with nick for most of it and he cheered me up. we saw orphan, which was good. and he bought me icecream twice.

i've decided that i'm devoting my time at UP to catching up with big brother and to prepare for some stuff i have to deal with tomorrow.

Falling Stars

[25 Jul 2009|11:35am]
[ mood | bitchy ]

i would like to point out that on top of everything else.... it got worse.

shawon has had a bad few days so i went to maxfields with him to cheer him up. the plan was to have a drink and hang out, then go. i waited a while for the bartender to give me my card back but he didn't. "i guess i'm creating a tab then" no big deal. i hate starting tabs because 1) i dont want to leave my card with someone and 2) i'm afraid i'll spend more and 3) if i spend more then i risk forgetting/leaving my card there.
so we sat on the deck for a few hours talking about this and that and then decided to go. so i went inside for my card and sure enough... the bartender couldn't find it. so he HELD OUT THE BOWL OF CARDS for me to look through to see if i found mine!!! because THAT'S safe. of course, it wasn't there. if i was drunk i could have taken someone elses though. so he went to ask the guy who served me, okay, maybe he put it someplace funky. no, he gave it to some guy by accident!

don't worry, he's a regular. i'm sure he was too drunk to notice and will realize it in the morning and will return it. we'll call you around noon with an update

i'm basically out of emotion, which i think is why i didn't flip out. i was also so shocked and stunned really. there was that moment though "do i freak out right now or not... no... freaking out won't fix this. he's admitting fault, freak out once that stops" annnd he said "well drinks on the house, for what it's worth" gee, thanks.

so we left, walked around, went to the racquette office and i attempted to report my card lost/stolen. the website has nothing for it...so after many "other" tabs i sent them an email. i attempted to call but it was a machine and wanted my telephone access code. as if. so the plan was to go to the bank this morning to report it.
as we were walking back towards my house i got a voicemail... not sure why my phone didnt ring but it was annoying because it didnt log the number. it was bartender at maxfields. it had been about a hour since i left. he was again, apologetic, and said they just closed all of the tabs and the guy that has my card DIDN'T EVEN HAVE A TAB! so he suggested i report the card lost/stolen.................


idiot. ugh. anyway, i went to the bank this morning and they made me call the number/told me how to get past the recording straight off. so that was good. and everything is taken care of, the card is now off and i'm not responsible for the additional charges the guy made.... oh yes. my bill at maxfields should have been $6.50. it was almost $8. he left a pretty awkward tip amount. after maxfields he went to la casbah where he spent $28 and then little italy where he spent $5.

maxfields will be calling in the next few minutes....

oh, and to make matters better, i woke up this morning because i thought i heard a squirrel. after looking around i decided it must have been on the roof or windowsill or something. so i got ready to go to the bank when suddenly.. i heard it again.. and i turned... and there it was in my kitchen. a big fat squirrel. so i turned back around for just a moment and when i turned around again it was gone. and i cant find it. it's either still in here hiding somewhere or it got back out. not impressed.

Falling Stars

[19 Jul 2009|12:07pm]
[ mood | crazy ]

i had to be at work at 7 am this morning. i woke up at 6:55. i had alarms set for 6:15, 6:30 and 6:45. i always set 3. i sleep through the first, ignore the 2nd and wake up/panic for the 3rd. but it works. i snoozed the 6:45 one, i guess. twice. i dont remember doing it.
i do remember i was in the middle of a dream. i was dismantling/deactivating a bomb. evidently in real life it was my phone.

Falling Stars

[ viewing | most recent entries ]
[ go | earlier ]